Do you hear the call to serve others as an End-of-Life Doula as I did?
[Deanna Cochran RN, End of Life Doula, Educator and Mentor]
One of my earliest memories of death was when I was about 7 years old and someone close to our family died. I heard people in my family talking about the death and when I asked to go to the funeral, I was told "no", and a hush fell over the room.
At the age of 7, my first experience with death portrayed it as something to fear. I felt confused, and helpless...and that I lacked something. If you've ever felt confused or helpless as I did while those you love face the end of their lives here among us, then you know exactly what I'm talking about. The Truth is, We Need to Not Blame Ourselves or others.Western society, for the most part, is fearful of aging and death. Many of the most popular products sold are 'anti-aging' creams and potions. Most people are so afraid of dying they will spend crazy amounts of money to try to avoid it for as long as possible.
Our society is very bad at dying. Even notable physicians themselves are asking us to change our ways. The subject is dubbed 'taboo' and often the people who seek to understand death (as completely as we understand birth) get called 'weird', 'morbid', or worse. I hear this all the time from my students. 
Years after my first experience with death, when I was 13 and living in Laredo, Texas, my grandmother said to me one day (in Spanish) "C'mon, get your shoes and come with me." She didn't say where we were going or what we were about to do. We walked down the rocky, unpaved streets of our neighborhood to her friend's home, where she lay dying. When we walked into the room I noticed several other women praying, all sitting quietly with their veils on.
I felt a majestic reverence in the room that is hard to describe. It profoundly affected me and I felt so honored that my grandmother included me in this vigil. Before I became a nurse, I learned to care for the dying in a very personal way. During the year I accompanied my grandmother's own dying, my aunts taught me how to take tender loving care of her at home. Fast Forward to 1999...Clarity hit me like lighting in my second semester of nursing school. I understood then that my work would be with those of us who are dying. I was supported and encouraged by my professors to follow my heart and within three months of receiving my RN license in 2000, I was training at a local hospice.
Throughout the last several years I have worked in oncology, long term acute care, and skilled nursing facilities, but mostly within hospice in various roles. In each setting, what became overwhelmingly clear to me was that there was so much needless suffering going on and that I wanted to be part of changing that. During this time, two additional family members who were very precious to me died from lengthy illnesses After the sudden, rapid decline and death of my mother from cholangiocarcinoma (very rare yet aggressive form of cancer) on June 15, 2005, I decided to start my private practice as a doula to the dying and their families. I was inspired by the lay birth midwives who assisted me in my own home birth in 1991. They helped me heal from the traumatic medical interventions from my first birth 2 years previously. I knew I could do the same for others that the midwives did for me and that I did for my own mother—I could help people and empower them to experience dying differently. The more places I visited to let people know I was available for this, I discovered that most people had many questions on how to deal with advanced illness in general.
One thing led to another and I found myself consulting with families regarding palliative care issues and created Quality of Life Care, LLC (QLC) in 2005. Being a nurse is the way that I serve the dying (for over 17 years) and I feel very blessed and fortunate to be able to do so. To be able to bring all I am into my End of Life Doula role now is a dream come true. I get to serve families exactly how they wish and I get to share my practical advice and wisdom with others.
We Each Have our Unique Gifts and Special Callings.
You too can find your own way to reach the dying in your community, express your passion for facilitating peace at this time, and serve.
If you would like help getting there, I'd love to be there for you. You too can find your own way to reach the dying in your community, express your passion for facilitating peace at this time, and serve.
If you would like help getting there, I'd love to be there for you. QLC is devoted to easing suffering at the end of life. We believe that with information comes empowerment and with excellent training and experience, comes confidence.
I'm dedicated to giving you a powerful, nourishing experience as you gain the tools necessary to accompany others through advanced illness and dying. I'm so honored to be among the pioneers of end of life doula training, role definition and professional and personal support. At QLC we are also passionate about palliative care. When QLC began in 2005, non-hospice palliative care was in its infancy as a movement within hospitals. Grassroots initiatives were taking hold within the National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization. In recent years, I've been featured in several media outlets that are helping educate society about the benefits of end-of-life care. The New York Times, Wanderlust, MedScape, QUARTZ, The Huffington Post, and Beacon Broadside just to name a few. In Response To Requests From Those Who Are Inspired To Serve, I Created a 4 Part Video Series for Future End-Of-Life Doulas To Learn All About the End-of-Life Doula Role At No Cost
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This virtual course addresses these common questions for those starting out, and MUCH more!
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How involved do I really want to get?
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What issues are involved in this that I might not be thinking of?
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I've been thinking about this for a long, long time - what is keeping me from doing this?
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Who is setting the standards?
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One of my soul mentors.
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What brings you joy?
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This free video series addresses all the important questions I get asked daily from people all over the world who are interested in this work. We have been doing this series for about a year now and people love it!
I share with you all the things to think about before you begin to pay any money on death doula training. At QLC, we are on the leading edge and others are beginning to offer courses like this one for upwards of $200.
Take advantage of my extensive background of actually serving hundreds of people over almost 2 decades and other end of life doulas since 2010.
I share with you all the things to think about before you begin to pay any money on death doula training. At QLC, we are on the leading edge and others are beginning to offer courses like this one for upwards of $200.
Take advantage of my extensive background of actually serving hundreds of people over almost 2 decades and other end of life doulas since 2010.
This is my gift to you. Only experience
can teach what is in these videos.
can teach what is in these videos.
This is everything I wish I had known when I was getting started as a private end of life doula back in 2005, plus so much more. Listen in and see which issues are yours and what you can expect to encounter if you decide to move forward with serving others at the end of life.
This powerful 4-part video series was created to bring you specific guidance if you feel called to bring love, peace, authenticity and comfort to others at the end of life. There are many of us coming forward as light-bearers wanting to share our wisdom with our communities.
This powerful 4-part video series was created to bring you specific guidance if you feel called to bring love, peace, authenticity and comfort to others at the end of life. There are many of us coming forward as light-bearers wanting to share our wisdom with our communities.